Feeling Torn

Last week I discovered two spider mamas absolutely bulging with their egg sacs, clinging to the screen on our garage window. For the first time in my life I felt some sort of emotion other than fear and disgust for the creatures. I think I actually said aloud, “I feel your pain!” But that’s where the empathy ended. Being the heartless, arachnophobic I am, I’ve since been nagging my husband daily to dispose of them somehow. I really do not want a million baby spiders finding their way into our garage next spring!
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Tonight as I was getting ready for bed, my five year old daughter bursts into our room and says, “That’s one big belly! You’re losing your belly button.” I had to laugh. Yes, I am saying farewell to my belly button…and for the last time EVER. In a few weeks this bulging belly, along with all those flutters and strong kicks, will be a memory. The difference with this pregnancy from those of my other three babies is that I KNOW this is the last time I will experience all of this. The heartburn, the waddling, the cramps and aches leave my body begging for relief; but my heart says, “Slow down, cherish every single moment of this miracle, this is the last chapter of your childbearing years!”

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