…they delight in the law of the Lord,
meditating on it day and night.
They are like trees planted along the riverbank,
bearing fruit each season.
Their leaves never wither,
and they prosper in all they do. (Psalm 1:2-3 NLT)
This time last year as I was wrestling with the decision of whether or not to homeschool I felt very frustrated trying to compare what we had always known (sending our girls on the bus to school everyday) to some other option I was completely clueless about. This notion of homeschooling…what would it actually look like? What did it involve? It was so hard to compare and contrast something we knew with something that was a total unknown. How would I make an informed decision? On top of that I felt so much pressure to make “the right decision” as if there was only one right road to walk, and woe betide if I misstepped and chose the wrong one. We would all be DOOMED! Or so the story would go in my head – where I had worked myself up to such a frenzy.
I was really putting a lot of unnecessary pressure on myself until one day my sweet husband reminded me that we really had the freedom to do either. When we stay planted and rooted and growing in God, delighting in Him, making Him the focus of our lives, there is great freedom! It’s when we attempt to manipulate and control and take matters into our own hands that we often suffocate ourselves with worry and fear. Psalm 1, in describing the way of the righteous, says, “Whatever he does shall prosper.” Now, please don’t misunderstand me here. We don’t make God the focus of our hearts and lives in order to prosper. Rather, our “success” flows naturally out of a life devoted to Him, a life not seeking to control its own outcome, but seeking Him above all else and trusting Him with the right and the room to “work all things together” (Romans 8:28). This big decision of whether or not to homeschool was looming in front of me, and I had really allowed it to distract me from the most important thing, that one needful thing…to sit at His (Jesus’) feet. I had worked it up in my mind to really be a bigger deal than it was. It wasn’t about making sure I picked the one and only right path for our family but about making sure that whichever path we took, we did it for His glory.
It wasn’t about making sure I picked the one and only right path for our family but about making sure that whichever path we took, we did it for His glory.
It was so freeing to realize that God had given me the freedom to choose and had even given me the promise of His blessing in whatever I did when I did it with and for Him! That gave me the strength to step out into the vague and fuzzy idea of homeschooling, the unknown. I was willing to give it a shot, but we were making no long term commitments. This first year was really about trying something new to lay to rest those pesky “what ifs” I knew I would always have if I didn’t give it a try. Next up…willing to homeschool but wishing I could do it undercover! Can you relate?
My Peace in the Puzzle 